(Note: Thought of giving this an adult rating and advising reader discretion. Then I saw a web series on an OTT channel and now I’m pushing this for primary school reading.)
I do not know about Sanskrit, which appears to be a pure language, but the vernacular Indian languages have a colour that English clearly cannot match. I am speaking of expressions, idioms, and metaphors. You have “A stitch in time saves nine”, “An army marches on its stomach”, “Don’t judge a book by its cover”, “Time is money”, and so on. All very plain, placid, prim, proper, and clean with a universal rating. They also go by the name of clichés. One can speak such things in front of children without twisting oneself or going red. A more eager child may use those words in front of parents or teachers without getting spanked or facing the modern-day equivalent of being denied a smartphone.
One of the most useful educational tools in India is your walking ground, where people from all diverse professions come together and enrich life. I have discovered that there exists a huge population of people who are neither doctors nor patients. I have also discovered many pithy statements and colourful expressions in the colloquial form of Telugu. Many of these have become staple conversational idioms among ordinary folk. These expressions sometimes touch the borders of vulgarity and sometimes delve deep into the other side. They are often hilarious and frequently contain a kernel of truth.
One popular saying describes a person who got angry on the lake and stopped cleaning his bottom. I challenge the English language for a comparable idiom that describes the foolishness of a person so graphically. Another pithy statement describes a young lady in a crowded function who silently passes gas, keeps a stoic silence, and holds a neutral face. Handling guilt in a supremely silent manner. These sayings are apparently popular in the villages where the elders sit under the tree and decide on the local fights. They are called “panchayats” in the local language, and such colourful expressions flow freely from the village elders, generally primed with a little bit of alcohol supplied by the warring sides. One way to admonish someone who preaches one thing but practises the opposite is to recount the story of a mother-in-law who advises her new daughter-in-law on proper marriage behaviour and then runs off with the neighbour.
Most bawdy language, epithets, or vulgar sayings originate from below the belt part of the human body, but I believe the umbilicus serves as the dividing line between the vulgar and the non-vulgar in physical terms. One important saint admonishes in his famous song people who gaze at the physical areas of the body, especially the navel. He asks to always remember that the body is simply a transformation of skin, flesh, and fat. As a medical person, the fascination for the umbilicus seems even stranger because, bacteriologically, it can qualify as the dirtiest region of the body. And we had a perverted movie director who was extremely fond of throwing all kinds of flowers, fruits, and vegetables on the zoomed-in navels of the female actors that the audiences lapped up. As my gossip magazines inform me, apparently no actress agreed to have watermelons or coconuts thrown at their navels. This director had the immense capacity to convert even a devotional film into a movie with an adult rating. Anyway, I am digressing.
Thus, most of these colourful expressions relate to private parts. There is a description of a loud-mouthed person with foolish bravado who drank urine, and his mouth became all dirty. This metaphor is again exceedingly difficult to understand when expressed in English. You say that in Telugu about a person who tries to attempt an unnecessary act, and you automatically know what he has done. Some of the more decent ones include describing a person who always speaks of his illustrious lineage. Grandfather has tasted ghee and is now inviting you to smell his mouth. Then there are dogs who become excited when a marriage function happens in town, aptly describing people who become excited about the most unrelated matters.
Anyway, the deadliest description of a person who simply cannot say no is likened to a woman who becomes pregnant because she was too shy. The first time one hears this phrase in Telugu, it is striking, as it provides a graphic description of a person who gets into all sorts of trouble being too shy to refuse a request. Then there is this hardest and goriest abuse, in my opinion, which one uses while driving on Indian roads and encounters an idiot walking, cycling, or driving in an absolutely random way. Road rage can take several forms, but the Telugus have found a silent way of venting out their anger quietly without raising their blood pressures or driving over the person or the vehicle. A senior has taught me to simply mutter quietly that this person is not born to one father. The anger goes off, the world continues at the same pace, and one does not have to visit the courts and lawyers on criminal charges. The immediate peace after the quiet abuse is immense.
Anyway, this is the story of Telugu expressions, and as I mentioned, most vernacular languages have a great repertoire of them. They make life rich and colourful, and they help handle the stresses of life very well. However, these are advanced skills when learning a language. One should not begin by learning to use these expressions. One of my dear friends from the North tried to start learning from this level, especially the one to abuse rogue drivers. I promptly stopped teaching him Telugu, the richest and the best language in the whole wide world. I would rather not give Telugu a bad name.
RANDOM MUSINGS 